S.U.P.

My stand-up paddleboard adventure, not to be confused with my stand-up comedy adventure, mainly because the latter hasn't happened...yet. This story features, unsurprisingly, a stand-up paddle board. Read on...

Picture this, a colourful sunrise illuminates the sky, the tinted light dancing across the glass-like surface of the sea. A cool, fresh breeze touches my skin as I enter the pristine water.
Now, with the sound of a needle scratching across a vinyl record, scrap that scene. Yes, the sunrise was picturesque, but the water was cloudy and somewhat choppy. This was Darwin in the wet season, so in lieu of a breeze the air was already thick and humid. Just getting dressed made me sweat.
I had the chance to try stand-up paddle boarding, often known by its acronym of S.U.P. Hubby wondered what the appeal was. “In a canoe, you get to sit down,” he said.
If you’re going to attempt to stand on a long, floaty thing, then flat water would be the best spot to learn. A few ripples would not stop me. As advised, I started by kneeling on the board before moving to an upright position. This proved tricky as the wavelets meant my feet were now on something akin to a giant plate of jelly.
In other locations, falling off would not be a big deal, but in Australia’s northern waters there’s more incentive to stay on the board. The possibility of crocodiles, box jellyfish and sharks had me ready to sprint across the water in a biblical way. There was even a rumour of a sea snake being found on the beach recently.
Eventually I mastered the standing part, but to actually dip the paddle into the water caused more comical wobbling. My own version of stand-up comedy! By the time I succeeded, the small waves had washed me to shore, so I started again. I did find my sea legs, but progress was slow.
The most sensible thing I did was transfer the board across to nearby Lake Alexander, where the water was more serene. While I was unconvinced that a croc would not make its way across the narrow slither of land to the lake, I found it more relaxing. There were a couple of early morning swimmers so surely this was safe water. The activity was much easier without waves and I was able to enjoy a slow trip around the lake’s perimeter.
I’m told S.U.P. is good for the core muscles. I felt these and a few others the following day.
Ah, life’s a stand-up adventure!